Thursday, January 15, 2009

Swimming in Absinthe

I woke up today, sore, stiff on my right shoulder and realized I have been in pain most of the night. Granted I woke up and felt refreshed after the last two days hassle of living while collapsing on the ice outside our apartment and falling right on your wound does not constitute a fun time to most people. To those who do find that amusing though, I recommend a nice shot of absinthe straight up so you can taste the bitter herb more clearly.

After waking up and finding out my daughters do not have school today, I checked out the latest news from our lovely, unbiased, nationally televised news channels. I watch Fox sometimes; other times I try to palate MSNBC; most of the time I read up on Libertarian news reports from the world wide web. But today I woke up to the sound of Bank of America dropping 25% and hearing about how this is an all out bombshell on the world! End Times-Armageddon-Fire and Brimstone-Death-World Wide Chaos! I called my brother, who once played the market game in Pasadena CA, as a consiglieri to a bunch of penny stock gurus, who calmed me down and told me this is not a huge deal; it stinks, but hey, they got free money from the Feds to use now. Realizing the free money is coming out of my pockets and my kids future pockets, I think Congress needs a straight shot of Absinthe to take the edge off of their illusion they think is reality.

After popping some pain pills and finishing up some online College work (I am now officially a college nerd, thank you!) I decided to watch some more news online while my kids ran wild and destroyed yet more stuff I have to clean up later. On the news I watched a lovely clip of Nancy Pelosi, my favorite San Francisco politician, introduce a Democratic Stimulus Bill that includes everything from rebuilding the infrastructure, more government college loans and grants, hiring more policemen and funds for more food stamps. To some of you this does not sound like a bad idea. Question: who is going to pay this off? Is it Congress for passing such a bill? No. Is it little green faeries who make money on trees and use it as income(kind of like our National Reserve, right?)? No. Is it us the taxpayers of now and the future taxpayers of the future like our kids? Yes. This bill being proposed is coming with the cost of $835 Billion dollars in projects. These projects are basic projects that our currently handled on the State level, not the Federal Level. Every State in the Union handles their own infrastructure, state college loans and grants, hires their own policemen and has their own state programs for welfare aid. Yes, there is a Federal Student Loan, FAFSA, as well as Federal Grants, a Federal Welfare System implemented as well, but every State also has their own programs used as well as those ones Federally. My case in point is not the semantics of Federal Programs or State Programs. My frustration is cost, and a Federal Cost which affects everyone More funds creates more control over the people because money buys people. Also, money which is non-existent means money borrowed which means more taxation on everyone including the poor, like me. not a whole lot of change from the bush Administration. In fact, it kind of feels like the Clinton Administration with his creation of higher taxation on the middle class in 1994-95. So I think nancy Pelosi need s shot of Absinthe, straight up so she can taste how bitter her own political creations really taste to the rest of the United States.

I have a plan: lets shrink government! But since I know we are in such a dire need for change and change has come in the name of a new Messiah from the Chicago Political Circle, I think I need a shot of Absinthe with sugar so it can go down bittersweet whilst I hide in fear for the very sanctity of our freedoms, rights, pocketbooks and sanity. How can we be governed by a man who unstoppably got into the office of the Presidnet of the United States by a landslide all in the name of not being a Bush, being Black and making Chicago Promises on the National front? No one knew what his politics were, aside from the lack of votes he made in Springfield, IL. no one knew his history excpet a handful of followers he formed while making political promises to lackeys in Chicago. Once people realize what Chicago Politics mean I doubt Chicago will ever see a politician reach the White House ever again. But hey, its change right?

We all should contribute financially to our government and to charity; after all, Vice-President Elect Biden said we all should contribute to our government and to charities. President Elect Obama donated $0 dollars to charity last year. Follow his example. He is a new Messiah, like Jesus.

President George W. Bush donated millions to charities to feed the poor last year alone. Do not do such horribe things. He is evil, like Satan.

8 comments:

Nyssa The Hobbit said...

You knew I'd love the fairy picture, didn't you. ;)

Aw, when I called you today you didn't even mention you fell on the ice and have been in pain. I hope the heating pad is helping. :(

The End of the World is coming! Get ready for the Rapture! Don't take the Mark! (Patty under the guillotine: "I'll take the Mark! I'll take the Mark!")

Oh, the joys of the federal government stepping into the states' business. You know why the water bills have taken such a huge hike recently? Because the feds are forcing us into making changes to our water system. Now the city will be fined for not moving fast enough, as if we weren't already giving our right arms, legs and firstborns to pay for water.

Jason_73 said...

Wasn't it state vs. fed that started the civil war?

Oh well. You's Americans sure have a mess on yer hands.

Come to Canada. We've been getting hosed for years now. You don't even feel it anymore. Must be the Absinthe (wormwood) in the water.

www.mylifeinbeta.net

Steve Oberg said...

Where can I get some Absinthe? Sounds pretty good to me. As for the "change" we need, I find it funny that those who have made a career out of bashing Bush are soon going to have to find something substantive to write about - just look at the op ed's from the NY Times (while they're still in existence), Chicago Tribune, LA Times and Newsweek lately. I saw one yesterday wishing that this past 8 years had all been just a bad dream - that we would soon wake up to find out that it was January 2000 and Gore had won! Just silliness!

Nyssa The Hobbit said...

The big question is, how do we know that Gore would have done any better? It's all hypothetical. I recall thinking during the debates that Gore was very confrontational and would lead us into war!

Chaz said...

Steve O.
They legalized Absinthe a couple years back. I was surprised when I found it in our local market. its expensive because of the hype and they cut back a lot of the "herb" in it. Or should I say, "root"...

Steve Oberg said...

Chaz- Um..... thanks.

Jason_73 said...

And here I thought all this talk about Absinthe was a covert Screwtape letters metaphor...

Jason
www.mylifeinbeta.net

Chaz said...

Yes it is a metaphor, guys. Sheesh.